A Diamond is a Girl's Best Friend

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Every little girl grows up dreaming of her wedding and the diamond that will crown her left hand.

That's the narrative, right? 

Well, I must have missed this programming because I never found myself using my vivid imagination to daydream about my wedding dresses, chosen colors, nor my desired diamond that would be presented to me as a man asked for my hand in marriage. 

No, instead my daydreams consisted of becoming an explorer who built dams alongside beavers. I daydreamed about hitchhiking across America with only five dollars in my pocket. I daydreamed about sitting in a Native American Indian Sweat Lodge as spirit animals were greeted and discussed. I daydreamed about milking a cow and learning how to lasso cattle from the saddle of mighty steed. I daydreamed about hoping on a train and riding the rails only to be dumped off in a mountain town. I daydreamed myself hiking the Appalachian Trail with all of my life’s belongings on my back. I daydreamed about wild adventure. And still do today.

This proclivity for the wild led to a childhood adored in “tomboy” clothing, dirt under my fingernails, and tangled hair not foreign to being matted in mud. I was a mess and it was glorious.​

Is it obvious I learned to walk and escape my crib at 9 months?

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It wasn’t until third grade that I felt the first pangs of self-consciousness concerning my own lens of life. I began to feel different, separate, and dare I say like a little bit of a freak. I did not blend in well, I was the tomboy in Michael Jordan’s basketball shoes and playing pick-up football with the boys at recess. The girls in my class were braiding hair and playing “wedding” and any attempt I made to hang out as the “wedding party” left me feeling bored and as if I had wasted my precious recess time. 

Years have passed, but this sentiment stays the same. Sure, there have been some developments along the way (I traded in my tomboy fashion for a feminine elegance and learned to curl my hair), but I am still that wild little girl. And with that, I still feel that same “otherness” that I felt when I was in third grade as I am still not the woman who daydreams about her wedding or the various arenas that fall under “domestic bliss”. Ultimately, I still feel like an oddball…

That is until I read a story like Jane Dotchin’s.
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Jane Dotchin is a badass woman who makes the 600 mile trek from England to the Scottish Highlands by horseback each year. She takes no map and carries minimal supplies…oh, and she is a mighty 82 years old. Yup, she’s wild.

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Jane has been making this annual pilgrimage since 1972. Each year, around the same time, she loads up her pony, Diamond, and she sets out on a seven week trek across her country's countryside. She has no practical reason for this trip, meaning that she is not on some mission to retrieve an item or complete some task, but instead her sole reason for doing it is to enjoy life. When asked her reason for starting this tradition decades ago, she simply answered, “I love camping and I love the countryside”. She’s a woman after my own heart. 
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Her story appeals to my own desire to wander and test the instinctive skills of our own survival as she ventures off with only the minimum: a tent, her food rations, a few personal belongings, and her Jack Russel Dinky all piled up on her pony, Diamond. She has no fancy gear. Instead, all she has is the will to enjoy life and set out on the road ahead. I love this detail because it is a stark contrast to our consumerist culture which has transformed the “outdoor lifestyle” into a competition to see who has the latest Patagonia; and instead, our girl Jane is out here ruling the road with the minimal gear that she has had for the past 50 years. 

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Jane is a badass wild woman because she does not let the rain, her age, or her limited eyesight deter her from her date with nature. Her story is inspirational to all, but for myself particularly it prompts a validation of my own desires as I travel further into adulthood. 

As I travel this winding road of adulthood, I still do not find myself daydreaming about my wedding, babies, or other arenas of “domestic bliss”, but the absence of these desires does make me feel that old familiar feeling of feeling out-of-place…or dare I say behind. But, I quickly snap back to my own reality of recognizing that those are not my desires, even if that is for right now. I do not feel pressured by some hypothetical timeline nor do I feel unfulfilled by not having the picture of “domestic bliss”. Because, again, my desires are rooted in freedom, adventure, new experiences, and embracing my own wildness…my own self as I am. 

Jane’s story is one that we can all gain inspiration from as she is a simple woman doing a simple task…enjoying life. 

And, she has reminded me that not every girl’s daydream diamond will be found on the left hand, but instead your Diamond could be the one that carries you into life’s next adventure.