Feeling Special in Special Ed.

High schoolers are known for being apathetic and unconcerned in regards to their teachers. They see you, they hear you, but their interest in you dies off there. It is not that they dislike you, it's just that they have much more important things going on in their lives: dating, social ladders, keeping up with their Snapchats, Netflix, and who is driving for off-campus lunch. Teachers and their school work does not even make their top ten list of concerns. This is something you learn not to take personally as a teacher. I come prepared, do my best, and try to make each day fun even if they respond in their most blase blank stares. 
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But, do you know where apathy finds no home in a high school building....in the Special Education classroom. This past week, I had the opportunity to enter my high school's Special Education classroom to interview a student for some testing. Before entering the classroom I could see a room of ten students that were focused and engaged on their teacher as she pointed to some images on the board. The room was calm and the students seemed tranquil while some had faint smiles on their faces. Not wanting to disturb the calm atmosphere, I slowly cracked the door and inched my way in. My plan was quickly foiled as I heard a voice from the back of the room say, "Woah, you're sooooo beautiful". I smiled at the student and then I immediately heard, "I love your red lipstick". I smiled again and said thank you to their compliments and then I heard from the other side of the room, "I love your long black hair. It reminds me of Wonder Woman". It was quite the spectacle as the room quickly flashed from tranquil to feeling like I had stepped onto a red carpet with my own paparazzi. Ms. Emily, the head Special Education teacher, said, "Class, this is Ms. Montoya. She is here to take one of our friends for testing.". She then went over to the student's desk and told him personally that he would be going with me into the next room to complete an assessment to evaluate the proficiency of his English skills. He stood up, gathered his items, and made his way over to me. As he left his desk, his desk-mate whispered to him, "Man, you're so lucky!". I smiled again and as we left I told the class that it was so nice to meet them and that they made my day. One of the girls in the front row said, "Come back to visit us again!". I made my promise to visit as I took the student for his testing. 

We went next door and sat down to complete our assessment, but this administration of the test was different from others because this student has limitations in his hearing and seeing capabilities. Therefore, I was much more hands on in the administration; versus, other adminstations when I simply set the student up to test and leave them to complete it autonomously. I worked intimately with the student and ensured that he felt comfortable and able to complete the work to the best of his ability. It was gratifying and it felt as if I was truly serving...and it reminded me of my "why?"...."my purpose". I chose to enter education because I wanted to be of service. I wanted to pass on skills and knowledge that will be useful in the real world. I wanted to empower children to believe in themselves and to trust their own abilities and intuition. 

It was an honor to serve this student and it was an honor to be in the presence of such sweet and innocent souls. I have always said that those students who are in Special Ed., whether they have down syndrome or autism or some other type of limitation, that they are higher souls. They understand the core meaning of life. They are quick to feel, they are quick to love, and they are joyful even if they are lacking in the accolades and praises of this world. They know that none of that matters. They are relational and they seek love at every opportunity….and that's beautiful and that’s what I aspire to be.